Today was a very remarkable day for me.

     It was today that I actually met President Bill Clinton face to face, and

changed the world a tiny bit for the better.

     Due to the recent victory of winning enough votes to pass his budget bill,

the President began his "victory" tour at Charleston, West Virginia today. I 

only found out he was arriving two days ago, and luckily, I was on vacation

and could attend the rally.

     As I planned to go early the next morning to get a good seat, I wondered

if there was really any point in me going. After all, wouldn't I see the same

thing on the evening news that I would see at the rally? Up til the last 

minute, I couldn't decide whether or not to drive the 45 minute trip from

Huntington to see him.

     I was glad I did.

     After making my way to the state capitol, I ran into two friends who 

helped get me into the special seating area - right at the very front of the

audience guardrail.  Mr. Clinton would be speaking less than 15 feet away 

from me. I was VERY excited.

     The capitol was "dressed up" in red, white, and blue flags and

decorations, and the hot sun shone heavily down on us from the perfect blue

sky overhead.

     When the president finally arrived, a certain shiver went through my 

spine. I was watching history in action.  Jennifer Holiday prepared to

 sing the star-spangled banner, and as the initial roar of the crowd began to

subside, Mr. Clinton happened to see me in the crowd, and nodded at me as he

put his hand over his heart.  Entranced, I followed suit.  As she sang, the

air seemed to shiver.  You could feel the energy in the air.

     As he spoke to us about his stimulus package and budget plan, my respect

for this man I already held in high esteem grew.  He was confident, engaging,

challenging, and very passionate about his beliefs. If there was one thing I

was certain of after he was finished speaking, it was that I truly believed

he felt his plan would work.

     But the best was yet to come.

     He walked from his podium after he finished speaking, and began to shake

hands with the crowd from the far left side. I had managed to squeeze my way

to the very front of the gate, and had plenty of room to shake the president's

hand.

     As the secret servicemen and media followed him, Mr. Clinton kept moving

closer towards me.  Finally, he was right next to me, shaking the hand of

someone right beside me.  He automatically held his hand out to me, still 

saying "hello" to the individual beside me when I said to him:




     "Mr. President, please keep trying to lift the ban."




     Since this wasn't California or New York, but WEST VIRGINIA, it was little

suprise to me when he jerked his head toward me in suprise and moved closer to

talk with me.

     He stopped moving and said, "Well, you know, things are at least a little

bit better than they were before when I was in office."

     And I said to him, "Yes, they are. And I appreciate the work you've done

on our behalf.  But like you just said a minute ago to us...'although things

are good now, if we work hard, we can make them better.'"

     He paused for a second, and said, "You know son, that's right. You're

absolutely right."

     I then told him, "Just don't forget about us, Mr. President. We NEED

you. We need your help. Don't forget about us."

     He took my hand very solemnly, and looked directly into my eyes and shook

my hand HARD.

     "I won't. I promise." he replied.

     At this point, the media were getting quite an earful, and were scrambling

to get this all down.

     He began to move on down the crowd, and as he did, tears began to stream

down my face.  He just happened to look back a minute later, saw me, and gave

me the 'thumbs up' sign.




      Now, whether you actually like or dislike Bill Clinton, or believe that

he will actually do anything more to help bring gays into the American

mainstream, I believe that I made an impact on him.

      Not just an image on a television screen, but up close and personal, I

could feel his stregnth and his love of country. I was not just "starstruck"

as I know I must sound now. In fact, I was very critical, until after the 

rally was over.

      I firmly believe that Bill Clinton IS a good president. I believe that

he IS trying within the best of his ability to help homosexuals in America.

I believe that he cares, and that while he may not be able to do much, he IS

at least concerned with the issue. Genuinely concerned, and not just because

one out of six votes he received was from a homosexual man or woman.

      Now, he may not follow through on his promise. Politicians are not known

for keeping their word, and to think any big change will take place in the very

near future is somewhat unlikely at this point in time.


     HOWEVER...


     I *DO* think I had a significant impact today.  I felt that *I* made a

difference.  The next time he deals with a piece of legislation or an issue

concerning homosexuals, I would like to think he'll remember the young man

in West Virginia who suprised him by asking him a question concerning the

policy that 'dare not speak it's name', and who pleaded with him to remember us

when the issue comes up.  He just might remember my words, and perhaps my face.

Even if he doesn't help us any further, he may remember his promise to me, and

feel a slight tinge of regret.  If that happens, then the effort I put forth 

today was worth it.

I took a giant step forward today, and came out to one of the most powerful men

on the face of this Earth.

     In many countries, to do so might be unthinkable. Even dangerous. And,

even in some parts of our country there is still some risk doing so in a

 public forum.  But I did. And I never felt prouder to be a GAY American in my

life. I felt that I was speaking for the thousands of men and women who could

NOT speak.  Whose voices had been silenced by homophobia and discrimination and

fear. I spoke, not for me, but for them.

     Perhaps, for today, I put a face on the "monster" of homosexuality. Today,

I helped us take a "tiny" step forward. A small step, to be sure, but one that

took us a little bit forward, nonetheless.

     My point in discussing this incident is not to praise myself, but rather

to share a story that might inspire others. I wondered as I ate lunch later,

what that rally could have been like if enough of my friends had cared to come

with me, and lined the gate at the capitol to tell him the same thing.  Would

it have made any more difference? I'm not sure. But I think the effort is as 

least as important as the result, so I would have to probably say "yes."

     One individual CAN make a difference. It's easy to forget that when we

are faced with hate and oppression from various sources. It's hard to remember

you're on the right side, when someone is threatening to beat you up or kill

you because you are different.

     But today, I took a chance and thought of the future. I dreamt of a better

world - one where difference and diversity could be appreciated and cherished

without violence, and where justice and peace prevailed. And I acted. I seized

an opportunity and ran with it.

     So, I guess I'd just like to say "go for it." I know what it's like to

feel like activism is worthless. I know how frustrating and hard the work is.

But today I was reminded of what one individual can do. But the greater 

revelation came to me when I thought of what several individuals can do when

they come together for a common purpose; and with a visionary goal in mind.

If I can do it, so can you. What, I'm not sure. But if you try hard enough, 

you can make this world a little bit of a better place. And believe me, the

way I feel now....it was worth it.


	Alan Schindler.....that one was for you.

	Rest in peace.





					Sincerely,
	           			James Christopher McDermott

					mcdermo1@muvms6.mu.wvnet.edu